So the other day a friend of mine was asking about how I knew I wanted to marry Robert. He has met the girl he is probably going to marry and is a little anxious about that big step. It was fun to relive that summer I met Robert and remember our life together so far. I told my friend how we met, and about that night on the water tower watching the stars:
We had planned to spend the evening together, but I was late. I took longer on the river that day because one of the people I was taking was an old man with Parkinson's. I'm pretty sure my hair was still wet when Robert picked me up. We went to a semi-lame rodeo, and it wasn't that late when we were done so we decided to go stargazing on the water tower. We were talking, but then Robert got quiet. He asked how I felt about him. When I told him I loved him(I still say he tricked me into saying it first) I felt his whole body sigh. It was like a big weight had lifted off his shoulders.
He loved me too. I told him I would be his as long as he wanted me, and he said he wanted me forever. After making sure he was serious I, of course, consented.
I also told my friend how Robert totaled my car while we were ring shopping and about how life has been since we got married that day in a blizzard. I told him it was hard: worrying about bills, buying your own groceries, not having insurance, living in less-than-great housing cause that's what you can afford, wondering if you are going to make it financially to that ever-out-of-reach next paycheck, using the bench seat from an old van as a couch, trying to make a nice home on DI furniture and hand-me-downs. But I also assured him that it was worth it. Every mold problem, every cockroach. Every burned dinner and made-up recipe gone horribly wrong. Every late fee on the light bill and every failed garden. Every cold afternoon or food storage dinner cause we couldn't afford the heat bill or grocery shopping. Every elbow to the face when you were sleeping and every stolen cover. And you know WHY all that is worth it? Because you grow so much closer together just being you two against the world. And now and then, mixed in with all the worry, there is an amazing moment. Crunching leaves together, paying off the car, shaving the dog together, nerf attacks, hearing your baby's heartbeat for the first time, finding out you won't lose your job at the end of the summer, long drives and long walks, hobo birthday parties and exploding candles, mullet march haircuts, surprise chickens. Sure we have had hard times, and for sure we have more ahead of us. But every memory I have with my Robert, and now my Edgar boy, makes it all worth it. You can't put off life just cause it's scary or you can't afford it. You have to find joy in the journey! That's how Heavenly Father wants it. And if you keep him in your life things will work out even against all odds.
Honestly, getting married was the best thing I have ever done. I have the best husband. He is so smart and wise and sees things so much more clearly than I do. He works so hard so I can stay home with our sweet son. He loves me even though I am lazy and some days down-right mentally challenged. Oh yes, marriage is worth all the hard times. I am the luckiest girl in all the world. Robert, I love you!
